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Florida Gets Real
All the Florida fit to print for residents and future ones.
BABY, IT’S COLD OUTSIDE & THE IGUANAS ARE ZOMBIES
Thinking of moving to Florida?
Are you ready for the bone-chilling cold and zombie iguana time?
Like much of the eastern half of the country, temperatures have dropped drastically in the Sunshine State in the last two weeks. This past Monday, it was in the 20s in Southwest Florida, where I live.
And the zombie iguanas? What’s all that about?
Iguanas, a non-native invasive reptile in Florida, are cold-blooded. When it drops below the 40s or 50s, these creatures get “cold-stunned” and go into a semi-state of paralysis.
Seemingly dead, they drop out of trees. Compassionate Floridians scoop them up and bring them home or to their cars to warm up.
The creatures revive, back from the dead like zombies, and might pick a fight with your pet or scare the hell out of you from the back seat of the car.
Zombie iguanas are a sure sign of frigid Florida.
Speaking of the cold, is this a temporary or permanent trend for Florida, where balmy weather is the state’s greatest natural resource?
Does the current cold spell mean global warming is indeed a hoax?
If you move down here, should you think twice about donating your winter coat and sweaters to Goodwill?
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THIS WEEK’S FLORIDA STORY
The recent record-low temperatures are a record of a changing climate and increased weather variability.
Yes, you can bring a snowball to the Senate floor, but global warming is not over with the recent cold drought in the United States and much of the world.
What’s causing all of this?
Painful Polar Vortex: as the Arctic warms 2-4 times faster than the rest of the world, the jet stream, the band of wind that traps much of the cold up north, loosens, and the cold polar vortex seeps farther south into the subtropics like Florida.
Hello Extreme Weather: increasing temperatures cause more precipitation that combines with the cold polar vortex, causing vicious mood swings of extreme weather
Snow in Tampa: a warming Gulf of Mexico meets the incoming Arctic air, causing greater winter storms and “ocean effect” snow conditions in some cities along the Gulf Coast.
So you’re keeping your winter coat, right, as Florida turns into the Lands of Always Winter in northern Westeros?
Maybe you’ll retire somewhere else. Build a house smack dab on the equator?
WHAT THIS MEANS…
As Lee Corso used to say on College GameDay, not so fast…
The current trend is for warmer, not colder, winters in Florida.
If You Currently Live in Florida
Unpack the Speedo or bikini from December to February, as winter temperatures in Florida have risen by more than 2° F since 1950.
Expect fewer freezes, as the number of days dipping below 32° F decreases.
If You’re Thinking About Moving to Florida
Keep some winter clothes for the periodic cold spells, but expect much of the winter to be shorts season.
Look for newer Florida homes with better insulation and heat for when it does get cold.
Invest in a quality light but warm “Florida winter jacket” that you can wear in the morning and evening when it’s cooler, and tie around your waist during the warmer afternoon temperatures.
So we’re donating some of our winter clothes to Goodwill. When we arrive in Florida, we’ll be certain not to house frozen iguanas that can zombify.
Anything else?
WHAT EVERYONE GETS WRONG
You are not alone.
Florida cold snaps affect the pipes in your home, your pets and the tropical plants in your yard.
Here’s the official Florida statement on the recent frigid weather:
“Cold temperatures can pose serious risks for Florida residents who are not prepared,” said [Florida Division of Emergency Management] Executive Director Kevin Guthrie. “As colder conditions move across the state, I encourage everyone to follow the Five P’s of Cold Weather Preparedness by protecting people, pets, pipes and plants, while also practicing fire safety. Taking these simple but important steps can help keep families safe and prevent unnecessary damage during cold weather.”
Let’s look at some takeaways.
One Thing People Get Wrong
As mentioned above, not all Florida homes have central heating and proper insulation.
The trend is for warmer winters, but highly variable weather means that cold drops could be really bone-chillingly cold, like now
If moving to Florida, tilt to new construction or at least newer homes.
Practical Tip
If you and a Florida resident are confronted by extremely cold weather, DO NOT use the oven to heat your home, and be very careful with portable heaters.
What We’re Watching
Power Outages: Cold and extremely warm summer temperatures lead to spikes in energy use, potentially causing power outages.
Do Your Homework: When researching a Florida area to relocate, ask your realtor or call the utility for a record of power outages during the cold winter and stifling summer months.
EVEN COLD IGUANAS GET THE BLUES
Remember, below 40° F, the iguana is not dead, just temporarily out of it.
Thinking of Florida and the cold is more peanut butter and vinegar than peanut butter and chocolate.
Think of the upside, though.
I’m from Queens in New York City. When spring rolled around after a long winter, it was joyous. People broke out shorts and t-shirts in a party atmosphere.
It will warm up again in the Sunshine State, and your Margarita-making skills will once again be needed!
If you found this useful, feel free to forward it to someone considering a move to Florida.
And if there’s a Florida topic you want explained — housing, taxes or lifestyle — just reply to this email and let us know.
Who Are We?
Team John Garuti is one of Florida's leading real estate teams and has sold hundreds of homes across the state.
As Team Leader, I read and act on every reply.
— John
